Let’s review. You may have read that coming out is a disclosure of your sexual orientation (or gender identity). Well, that’s wrong. We have to totally redefine coming out.
Coming out is NOT an announcement of sexual preference. Coming out is revealing the truths about yourself by removing the masks you have worn so that the listener will be moved toward our cause to end prejudice. Coming out’s main goal is to provide a setting for breaking down the myths and destroying the lies and distortions. (We’ve heard this before from visionaries like Milk.)
If coming out were an announcement of sexual preference, then post it on Facebook, Tweet it, email your address book, and put it on your shirt. But to do that would be the greatest disservice to social equality I can think of. A fully wasted opportunity.
Ultimately, it’s not important whether or not you’re gay… and it’s not important whether or not someone knows that you’re gay. Alone, the fact accomplishes nothing for you or the people you come out to.
Coming out is the best opportunity to share your convictions. It should not only free you to be who you are, but it should help others be better able to be your friend and more capable of inclusiveness and understanding. Don’t come out in vain by ignoring the powerful opportunity to fuel personal growth for you and your friends, to fuel the change toward social equality.